But there was no scientific evidence for this theory. It was based on opinion, not fact, and subsequent research has proved the myth wrong. However, despite new information, it seems that the spoiling myth has been handed down from generation to generation and still influences many parents today.
When your infant cries she is trying to tell you that she needs something—food, a loving touch, a diaper change, or perhaps she does not feel well. Crying is her way of communicating with you.
When you consistently respond to her crying and meet her needs in a positive manner, she learns that you are a reliable and safe source of comfort that she can trust.
She feels connected to you and loved. This is especially important during the first year of life. Such positive parental response helps children feel emotionally secure, tolerate separation from their parents when they are older, and learn to trust themselves. It builds their confidence, assures children that parents and other caregivers will be there for them during times of need, and eventually helps infants learn how to soothe themselves, resulting in less crying and fussiness.
I agree with this concept. I had my first born at a very young age. I was told by numerous people what to do and what not to do with my child. I felt like I had to sort of live up to what other people modeled as being a good parent.
Marlena, this is exactly how I felt. I felt so overwhelmed by people telling me what to do. Ultimately, listening to our instincts and giving our babies lots of love is all that matters. We keep the philosophy that we are always available to comfort our kids. That means we checked in with them each and every time they cried. We gave lots of snuggles and hugs. My kids are now 8 and 11 and will stop pop over for a quick hug if they need an emotional boost, but they are completely confident children.
I would do it all again in a heart beat. I love your perspective being further down the parenting line. Thank you so much for sharing your perspective! Your email address will not be published. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed. Terms Conditions Privacy Policy. She always arrived a little late and embarrassed. Despite the perceived judgment, Amanda went anyways.
After the talk, the moms would exchange stories. Every week was the same. Each week, Amanda would shake her head no. Not wanting to fail her child, Amanda resolved to let her self-soothe more and hold her less. Can you spoil your baby by holding her too much? Here is what science says… When it comes to understanding if you can spoil your baby, attachment theory is the best way to get your answer. Additional related reading for new parents.
Read More. The 5 S's are a series of popular steps used to soothe your fussy baby. We'll explain the method and the reasoning behind each one. Mommy thumb is common in new parents because of changing hormones and the repetitive stress motions that come with holding and breastfeeding a baby.
A high need baby may seem to fuss and cry endlessly. We'll look at other characteristics and ways to get through these challenging months. The sound of a whiny baby can easily give you a headache and send you searching desperately for answers to make.
Learn more about why babies…. Right now your little one may depend on you to help them fall asleep, but ideally, they'll become a self soothing baby who can do it on their own…. Learn sleep disorder signs and when…. If your baby is smacking their lips, it's probably a sign that they're hungry, teething, or tired. If you want your baby to improve their self-soothing techniques, you may wonder how to get them to take a pacifier.
Here are our top tips. Gripe water is a remedy available in liquid form. It contains a mixture of herbs and is often used to soothe colicky babies. Continue Reading Below. Read This Next. Understanding Newborn Breathing. Am I Breastfeeding Too Frequently? View Sources. First Year. First Year Groups. Go to Your Baby's Age.
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